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Help! I am in desperate need.
In 18 days I will drop my first born child off at college.
I am not ready mentally. I don't think he is ready mentally or otherwise. I know I'm probably exaggerating, but it doesn't feel like it.
When I tell him we need to start making lists, he says he doesn't need anything. The only thing he's really worried about bringing is his television and Xbox, which leaves me with very little confidence in his ability to actually succeed in college.
Other than his basic linens and toiletries, and, of course, clothing, I have no clue what he needs.
If you are an experienced college mom, please help me. What does he really need, besides some serious prayers?
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I don't think he is ready mentally or otherwise. I know I'm probably exaggerating, but it doesn't feel like it.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you're exaggerating. This is the same boy who recently ate soap, isn't it? :-)
He probably really doesn't need anything. Guys are like that. And if he does, I'm sure he'll let you know.
I am not a college mom but it was only 12 years ago that I was a college student. If things haven't changed that much, I can tell you that as a boy, he won't need much but one thing he will need is a way to transport all of his shower necessities to the bathroom if he doesn't have a private one. Some sort of plastic tote or bucket with drain holes for the soap, shampoo, etc. The next item on my list would be shower shoes because no one wants a fungus among us and those non-private showers are breeding grounds for athlete's foot.
ReplyDeleteBesides that, things like tiny refrigerators or microwaves are not necessary in my mind, but a good sturdy laundry bag and a lamp would finish off my list (dorm rooms are notorious for bad lighting). You know you have my prayers and now you have my 2 cents too!
Bookshelf. I used milk crates, but whatever works. A few office supplies (stapler, pens, pencils, notebooks). Shelf stable foods in case he misses the dining facility.
ReplyDeletelots of quarters so he can call home. boy, it's only been 13 yrs since i entered college and my how things have changed since he text msg'd you from the game.
ReplyDeleteseriously though, has he spoken to his future roommate? you need one source of music, he seems to have tv and xbox covered, a small coffee pot, and though small fridge and microwave are not needed they would be nice. lots of change and soap so he can do his own laundry (unless he will be bringing that home often) and a sharpie to get me robiskie's, hartline's, laurenitis' and beanie's autographs ;)
perhaps throw in some prozac for yourself.
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I'm with Jennie. He'll let you know soon enough if he needs anything! Plus I'm getting the impression that he's nowhere near as [hyper] organized as you are, Barbara.
ReplyDeleteI can say that, being the [hyper] disorganized one.
If you still feel compelled to be providing for his needs (and as such, your sanity) then sit him down with a Target ad and say, "Is there anything here you think you'll need?" If still he's resistant then go back to plan A and let him go a week or two without, like, pens & paper & underwear & such.
That'll learn him!
PS. And as much as I'm teasing you, you do know that you're paving the way for me mentally & emotionally. They really do grow up, don't they.
ReplyDeleteBarb:
ReplyDeleteAs a mom who's put three in college now, I can't tell you how invaluable it will be for him to have a network of supportive faith-filled friends. This is hard...it's something you can't give him, but can guide him towards. He needs to navigate carefully as he will be barraged by many clubs, fraternities, etc. Encourage him to talk to older students who have "passed through the fire." So many young people have spent most of their lives preparing for college, but not for the reality of college life. It is a heady experience, that first dose of freedom. Don't assume that he doesn't want or need you now...first year students are incredibly lonely, even in the midst of the mania. Keep the lines of communication open, establish routine check-in times so you don't worry incessantly when he doesn't answer the cell or dorm phone. Otherwise, pray and trust! Keep your ears and heart open...all will be well!
I looked through this list and it seems to cover everything I would have thought about. I disagree about candles (dorm + fire = bad), and I don't understand the need for dust masks(???), but the majority of the list seems good.
ReplyDeleteFirst aid kit, general medicine for upset stomach or colds. When a bunch of new people get together, everybody tends to catch everybody else's viruses.
Money. Snack food/soda. Observe his habits for one day. He won't have access to your kitchen/bathroom/pantry, so what does he like to have?
For my daughter, who is a second year college student, she loved having a mattress foam. They come in handy when learning to sleep in a new bed on a different kind of mattress. Rolls of quarters for laundry-rolls and rolls :-), a collapsable hamper and a box of cards with forever stamps. Those are just a couple of the most important things I sent with Kate. Hope this helps.
ReplyDeletePaula