Left to Tell

The below "review" is my post for Nutmeg's Book Club.

Reading Left to Tell was one of those “stranger than fiction” experiences for me. While I have seen movies about the holocaust in Rwanda, and, honestly, I know it happened, it is still very hard for me to believe that it occurred, especially during my lifetime. I could have easier believed someone made the whole thing up.

To me, the Rwandan genocide is more surreal even than the Jewish Holocaust. I suppose it is easier for me to believe that one person could mastermind such a plot. In Rwanda, however, the people turned against each other. They were not trained soldiers. They were not following orders. They were regular citizens who killed each other out of extreme hatred.

And while I find it hard to believe, at some subconscious level I also find it incredibly possible. Can I see this holocaust happening in the United States? Actually, yes. As frightening as it is to imagine, it is actually possible to imagine two parties of people (like members of the Democratic and Republican parties) killing each other in the streets. I don’t know why I can wrap my mind around that concept and still have a hard time believing Rwanda occurred. I suppose it’s the difference between believing what really happened and imagining what could.

Sadly, Rwanda did not have a government able to control the war, or maybe they didn’t want to. Left to Tell really does not delve into the political structure of the country and the reasons why the fighting got out of hand. Fortunately in the U.S., (I believe) there are better checks in place. I don’t know what happened in Rwanda. After reading this book, I only know that people can hate each other so much that they will kill in cold blood, like rabid dogs.

I am sad that this book did not leave me more inspired. It really should have. I just could not get into Immaculee’s head. I felt her fear, to some degree, and I felt her relief when she was rescued. But during the time that she was hiding, I just was not with her. I find it incredible (not unbelievable -- but incredible) that she was able to leave herself as she did, through prayer. And maybe that is why I cannot get into her head. Maybe she wasn’t in her head. Maybe the answer to her prayers was that, like many Catholics before her, St. Theresa of Avila for example, she experienced ecstasy. Immaculee talks about praying the rosary for hours.** While I am personally devoted to Our Blessed Mother and the rosary, I cannot imagine being able to pray for hours. I, however, have never been in that situation. Maybe that was God’s gift to her – to be able to escape her misery through her prayers.

I think God must also have given Immaculee the gift of forgiveness.*** I’m fairly certain, given the circumstances of her self-imposed captivity, her imminent danger, and what she found upon release, that I could not have forgiven my fellow man, at least not so quickly.

While I hesitate to admit this (please don't throw tomatoes), as I am probably only one in a hundred that feel this way, I am just slightly skeptical of the story -- maybe not the story as a whole, but certainly the details. (I am a skeptic in many things, though, so keep that in mind.) I don’t remember Immaculee ever saying that she kept a journal. So, I wonder how she could possibly remember details, direct quotes, of conversations she had years before? Maybe because I have such a poor memory, myself, I find it hard to believe that she remembers conversations she had with her family when she was just a child.

All in all, I found this book worth reading. I’ll not say it was enjoyable, as it was too tragic to be enjoyed, but it was worthwhile to read about this horrific event from a personal point of view. I have seen Hotel Rwanda, as well as Beyond the Gates, recently. None were from the perspective of one individual, especially that of a survivor.

If nothing else (and there certainly was more to the book than just this) Left to Tell teaches us to be aware of our history. Immaculee had no idea that there were two different cultures in her country. That, to me, would be like not knowing about the Civil War, or about the different political parties in our country. It certainly does no good to ignore the past, in hopes that it won't repeat itself.



** "...I prayed the rosary multiple times, as intensely as I could, every day. Working through all those Hail Marys and Our Fathers took 12 to 13 hours..."

*** "If they kill me, God, I ask You to forgive them. Their hearts have been corrupted by hatred, and they don't know why they want to hurt me."