Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Phil 4:6-7



Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Blue Days



Yesterday was a super crappy day. Lots of sh*t happening, none of which was good (well, my new sofa was delivered and that was good). And no one died, or went to the hospital, nothing that serious, just the kinds of stuff that happens when something or someone intrudes on my bubble.

I admit I live in a bubble. I would lose my mind if I didn't. I don't watch news, I prefer to stay home, I get most of the information I know from familiar sources -- those I choose. I am fortunate. Not everyone can do that. And my bubble is my protection from the outside world which makes me crazy, maybe not "diagnosis crazy," but maybe it would be if I didn't have my bubble.

Yesterday was a blue day, sort of a denim blue crayon, headed into another blue day today, more midnight blue crayon. I don't usually think in colors, especially crayon colors, but blue days are definitely different shades. Yesterday and today are definitely not robin's egg blue crayon days.

After 9/11, I think many Americans, including myself, had great faith in our fellow man, even after all of the awfulness that 9/11 brought with it. Our own worlds, I felt, got a little closer, a little softer. We were gentle with each other, for the most part.

In the past five years or so, I think the gentleness has been lost. Yesterday was an example of that to me, that people can be mean with absolutely no reason, and I think people are meaner today than they have been in my entire life. I find that the people I come in contact with today (when I must emerge from my bubble) are self-centered, lazy, greedy, and faithless.

I know this post is depressing, and my apologies. I guess what I just wanted to say is, without my bubble, which includes all of the people I know here and on their own blogs, and people I know in real life, who have faith in a wonderful, all-powerful God, this world would just be too murky a blue to even find my way in. Today, I am ever so grateful for the Light.

18 comments:

  1. Oh yes, my friend, I can definitely relate to this! Often, I can't even think about what's going on in the outside world ... or I get very blue ... Thank God for faith-filled friends! And for a Church that continues to point us toward the one true Light of the World! {{Hugs!}}

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's good to know I am not alone, Sarah.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Barbara, I feel much the same way some days.

    I start to feel like I can't cope when someone starts going on about Obamacare or some other such bad news. I just want to put my head in the sand, stay in my house and ignore it all. I live in a bubble as well, and most of the time I prefer it.

    Hang in there, praise God, and know that you are not alone!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks for commiserating, Angela. I can feel a soft glow coming from you! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  5. You are definitely helping to light up my bubble, Barbara!!! Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Barbara,
    I also can relate. Sort of had the same type of day. Hope you're feeling better.
    Much prayers and hugs,
    Gail

    ReplyDelete
  7. I know exactly how you feel. I like my little bubble world!

    Sarah said it best: "Thank God for faith-filled friends."

    ReplyDelete
  8. Three cheers for bubbles! I try really hard not to worry about things "outside". When I do, I have to consciously stop and look around at my own little "bubble", this tiny little corner of the world that I actually do have an influence over. And it's good! That's enough. (My mother disagrees. :0) )

    ReplyDelete
  9. "self-centered, lazy, greedy, and faithless." I AGREE!

    ..it is the faithless part that worries me. I use to have great anxiety over others and their souls that were going south. I asked God to help me with that worry because it was causing great pain in my heart.

    I blog because I live in a bubble also. I find comfort in others like you who search for truth and actually live it.

    I worry about my kids. I wonder if I am raising them to be strong enough.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ana Maria -- give me a date, girl!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Gail, thanks for sympathizing. A new day...a new chance to try again!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Jenny,
    It's a great bubble, isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
  13. That's funny, Jennie, that your mother disagrees. I wonder why? My mother thinks it's grand!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Christine,
    "I worry about my kids. I wonder if I am raising them to be strong enough."

    Me TOO! Love ya.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Oh yes, yes, yes. And precisely the reason why I have been absent from the blog/online life. I have been feeling so weighed down lately -- doesn't make for very good company.

    But funnily enough, I was thinking of you the other day, and I thought, "Maybe I should email Barbara, just to say 'hi'." And then I thought, "Nah, she's probably got a lot going on and doesn't want to be bothered."

    See? I should have listened to the nudge!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I am always late to the party. I live in that bubble too, and I love my bubble. I have a really hard time being with other people that are faithless...I surround myself with good, and this blog world is full of that good. It's almost surreal being around people with no faith. And then trying to explain that to my children. My brother is getting married tomorrow. (No Mass, but he is having the Sacrament of Matrimony given in a Roman Catholic Church!) I know he no longer goes to church, nor does his fiance. His fiance's family I remember my mom telling me they don't go to church either. My kids were asking about those things today, if they go to church, etc...and they whys. So hard. Faith is a gift. Grace is a gift, it's always there. But we need to allow God to give it to us, He's not going to force us.

    This makes me think of:

    Matthew chapter 11:29-30

    "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your selves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”

    Give it to Jesus.

    It also reminds me of St Francis De Sales, who talks a lot about friendships and how we need to surround ourselves with like minded people.

    Sorry your day was so blue.
    I'm also sorry I was so late to the party...When I think of you, I smile.

    ReplyDelete

I appreciate your comments -- sometimes I feel like I'm talking to myself!