...I offer the eleven rules of sibling engagement in my house.
Today we took college boy back to campus. It's been a long break, can I say that? I had hopes, I honestly did, that he would have matured, even slightly, after being away from his siblings for 10 weeks. But, alas, he is still the same, developmentally-a-three-year-old son I sent away to college. If that surprises you and you think my college-age son is more immature than his peers, I assure you that many parents of teens (o.k., and young adults) will tell you that teens regress exponentially the older they are, and become the preschoolers they once were, except without the endless cuteness. I don't know when the regression reverses. Anybody? Anybody?
Anyway, I digress. The rules of engagement are the same as they were before college boy spent 10 weeks and thousands of dollars away from home, except that in shorts bursts of time, as are found at holiday breaks, they are excruciating to "parental units." And, of course, "parental units" have vastly less patience when dealing with major holidays, out-of-town family, and bickering children. The rules of engagement are, in many ways, similar to the toddler rules of possession, because, I have found, all children are really toddlers at heart.
1. Size is power, and I have it.
2. Age is power, and I have it.
3. I can get you in trouble, and that's power, and I have it.
4. The last cookie/candy/soda/piece of pizza/shotgun position in the car is mine because I say it is.
5. I can love you one minute and hate you the next minute and I don't have to warn you that I am changing my mind.
6. Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names hurt feelings and I'm telling mom.
7. If mom screams, everybody freeze.
8. If mom asks who did it, don't say anything.
9. If engaged in verbal combat, always stoop to the developmental level of the youngest child involved.
10. Yelling in fun sounds just like yelling in anger to mom and we will be in trouble irregardless. Don't yell.
11. If you get in trouble, kissing mom on the cheek will break her down and she will forget that you are in trouble.
Happy Eleventh Day of Christmas. Are we there yet?
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great points! i will have to remember these as the kids age.
ReplyDeleter
Barbara, you are most certainly allowed to say that. Our oldest ds has been away from home for the longest stretch yet--five months. In some areas he is beginning to show signs of maturity but it still amazes me at how quickly the regression with his siblings begins.
ReplyDeleteTell you what. Let's get your college boy and my 4-year-old Hun together. That'll learn 'em!
ReplyDeleteLoved your list, Barbara. Don't look forward to living it, but I loved it nonetheless. :)
Oh boy...I know of what you speak! :) Only, it's my second child...my first is from another galaxy...mature, helpful, kind and considerate, eats with perfect manners....he is a gift from the gods!! My second one is pure Neanderthal (said with much love in my heart!) :) Good news though! He (Neanderthal boy) was accepted into a pre-pharmacy college 5 hours from home and upon graduation from high school/summer vacation, I will be depositing him there with his very own box of Tide!! Yahooo!! :)
ReplyDeleteand then I'll cry all the way home...:(
I'm right there with you and I don't even have a college student yet! It HAS been a long break...back to school, everyone!
ReplyDeleteRegina,
ReplyDeleteJust appreciate them while they're little. And know that poop-head is appropriate name-calling for the under-seven crowd. See rule number nine for its use among all other ages.
Michelle, I am so glad to hear it happens elsewhere!
Margaret,
It would be an even fight I think!
Cheryl,
Your firstborn is from another galaxy. How do I go about getting one of those?
Barb,
Just you wait!
That was hilarious, thanks for the laugh this morning!! Glad to see you have a sense of humor (now) about it!!
ReplyDeleteBarbara....that list is CLASSIC!!!
ReplyDeleteNone of my children are college age..yet. I suppose I'm just glad that my hair is totally gray..already!
Barbara, I guess we will have to resort to the old "Act your age, not your shoe size" rule? LOL!
ReplyDelete