My thoughts, continued

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Rather than address each of my lovely readers individually in the comment box (thank you for all your support -- you girls are awesome), I am continuing to chat about this subject today as, clearly, there is much to say on the topic.

First, I want to say that by citing the title of the movie to which I objected I am in no way judging another for watching that movie. As Margaret stated, this is a very personal issue. What I object to may not be what you object to.

That said, my point was not that I object or you should object, but that I personally felt that Jesus would object. In my attempt to live my life, and encourage my children to live their lives, with God at the center, I should not be watching films, or television, or reading books or viewing websites, etc., that I feel would be offensive to my Lord.

After the incident I mentioned yesterday, I logged onto our Netflix queue and checked out every movie in the queue. I like to use this website because it gives me a blow-by-blow per se of each category -- ***, violence, drugs/alcohol usage, language. (I also use this site for its faith perspective, and Margaret mentioned the U.S. bishops' movie site which seems to have more movie details than they used to.) I deleted six movies from my movie queue -- all movies that on the surface seemed just fine, and, in fact, had worthy stories. On closer inspection, however, I read about details of scenes (including one female/female *** scene that I would never have foreseen), and specific language, including blasphemy, and in each instance I thought about Jesus sitting next to me on the sofa and imagined just exactly how I would feel watching the film with Him. Well, I don't even think I need to say just how I felt in some instances. Jamie mentioned that she has a friend who only watches movies that her children should watch. I don't know if I would chose that as my benchmark, as I know I would not watch some very serious movies (i.e. Passion of the Christ) with my nine-year-old daughter. I think, however, that choosing movies I would watch with the Lord is the way to go for me.

Secondly, I know that I did not "ruin" my son. It is almost laughable that I am worrying about my 19-year-old son in this manner. He is an adult (though still my child). My issue is that this incident happened on my watch. If he goes to his girlfriend's house and watches a movie not of my choice, I can not change that. If he walks into a movie theater and pays for a ticket to a movie not of my choice, I can not change that. And when he moves out on his own and watches movies not of my choice I can not change that. I can, however, control what I do in my house and how that choice, in turn, affects my children. Yes, I guess that makes this about me. I have been there, done that with kids going off to college and doing what they want -- wild and carefree. Honestly, I try not to think about it. Under my roof, with my knowledge, there must be limits, and I get to set them (with my husband's input, of course). ;-)

Third, I realize my own son's culpability in this matter. Though I made the choice to bring the movie into the house, he chose to pick it up and watch it. We talked. And talked. The thing is, parenting is one place where "do as I say and not as I do" doesn't fly. As Regan said, we are hypocrites if we sit and watch a movie and then say, "Oh, this is not for you." As an adult, albeit a young one, my son can see right through that. Even if he obeys me now, he will see that making poor choices is something we do when we leave home and are in charge of own lives. Not a good example.

I see that there are many things that we can change at home, and I am not blind to the fact that some of these changes will be hard. My children are old enough to resist -- yes, they love this culture. It's fun, isn't it? Exciting and titillating. All that and more. No one ever said parenting is easy.

"What good fortune therefore it is to receive a good, truly Christian upbringing, to enter with it into the years of youth, then in the same spirit to enter into the years of adulthood." --Saint Theophan

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