Proverbs 27:11 Study wisdom, my son, and make my heart joyful, that thou mayst give an answer to him that reproacheth.Maureen Whitman has a new column up over at Catholic Exchange (go through the link at her blog here). It's about helping our children to learn good behavior at Mass. She has some great suggestions.
I didn't always have good children at Mass (in fact, sometimes I still don't have good children at Mass, at ages 17, 14, 10 and 5). But, this past Sunday something happened that almost never happens (I think it happened once when I had really little ones).
A couple, who happened to be sitting behind us during Mass, approached Doug and I after Mass. The woman said she wanted to tell us what a pleasure it was to sit behind us and see such well-behaved children at Mass. She said it was especially nice to see children who participated in Mass, especially the older boys, instead of "rolling their eyes and wondering, 'when will it be over?'"
Doug and I thanked her and went home. But, her comments stuck with me all day and even into the week. I am hard on my kids (I think!) and really expect good behavior at church. No leaning your buns on the pew, hands folded in prayer, sing (for your music grade), and all eyes on Father.
It makes my heart joyful to know that my children have learned how to be reverent, after so many years.
Strengthened with all might, according to the power of his glory, in all patience and longsuffering with joy, Giving thanks to God the Father, who hath made us worthy to be partakers of the lot of the saints in light. Colossians 1:11-12
So what's the secret?! Mine are 8, 5, and 1 and are really mostly behaved in church but not always active participants. I confess to letting my 5 year old draw on the bulletin. She draws pictures about Jesus and sometimes even about the gospel story, which I think is pretty good. Still, there's too much shushing and glaring that I'm looking for ideas to keep them in line!!
ReplyDeleteBarbara, that is wonderful. Someday I hope my children will get complimented like that!
ReplyDeleteWell, if you've read Maureen's column, she had some pretty good tips.
ReplyDeleteMy kids are a little older than yours, so I can say you are headed in the right direction. We sit very close to the front of the church, and at our church, few people sit in the very front pews, so we have a pretty good view of everything.
We also attend daily Mass (usually) once a week. So, my five-year-old knows what she's doing for the most part. She kneels when she should and folds her hands in prayer, and, God Bless her, makes the Sign of the Cross at the right times. But she's had pretty much practice, since she was an infant. I do still have to ask her to sit still frequently (she's a very wiggly girl!), but not so much that I have to take her out or punish her. I have threatened to take her out, but she knows that means punishment after Mass.
We have a church bag, with St. Joseph coloring books, and a mass book, which I recommend for your eight-year-old. My daughter does not read yet, so it's only marginally helpful, but would be great for a reader. I got it from another Catholic mom (lmellender@yahoo.com). It has the complete Mass with some pics and is laminated with places for the child to check off what's happened. Most Sundays my daughter doesn't get into the bag, but you never know when you'll have along homily. Magnificat also has Magnifikid, which is a weekly booklet for children which contains the readings and Gospel and explanations. We've used it in the past, but now the boys are too old (or at least think they're too old) and my daughter is still a bit too young.
Keep up the good work, and the more they attend, the more children know how to behave, which is why I always insisted that my children come with me instead of going to a nursery or splitting up for Mass. My husband is not very patient, so he often wanted to split up, but that doesn't help the children learn. So, I just make sure the youngest stays next to me.
And keeping Lifesavers in your purse helps!
What an encouraging compliment. I hope you shared it with your children too. The Bible says in Proverbs that even a child is known by what they do and just think of all the children who might be looking at your children.
ReplyDeleteBlessings!